There is so much yuckiness going on in our world. I cannot even begin to comprehend the magnitude of how much suffering, sadness, mindless destruction, hurt, devastation, abuse and greed that takes place each day. Fear, loneliness, hatred seep in causing a murky darkness that pervades the nooks and crannies of people’s lives. A hopelessness draws you in as you helplessly at times are trying to seek out answers, making sense to a nonsensical world. The why of what I witness takes its toll to something beyond my own limited experiences. Dreams shattered of the young and old, loss and hardship multiply, our common home and community dwindle, and the cost of living skyrocket. Oh to have food on the table.
A few days ago I read from our diocese web page that Pope Francis is making this year, a School of Prayer year. What a faithlift!! I like that idea. Giving rest to the weary soul who seeks comfort and strength in times of need and delight to the graces bestowed undeservedly. I am but one person. And yet, it got me thinking about what prayer has done and still does for me in my own life. I think it is in prayer and gratefulness that I look to stave off the perils and hopelessness pervading the insides of me.
On a daily basis there is a conflict or struggle with right and justice. My heart hurts and my smile fades as I see the world’s ills as well as in my own backyard. Absolutely there are things that happen of a natural nature such as sea and earthly destructions or to people you love as they battle their health or loss of something dear to them. Don’t get my tears going there. Whether man-made or natural, the ills of the world, near and far, can continue to foster a hopeless, helpless, senseless disbelief. But then, I realize I can do my part in my own little way to do the good, to be of goodness, to be life-giving. In that, prayer is a start as well as the knowledge of being grateful and aware of my own actions and words.
How? Well being retired, I am available. Oops that came out wrong. I am able to do things that others may not have the flexibility. I am so happy as my older sister got an iPhone because she is able to now contact me when visiting my mom. Mom may not know me but I do and I can say “mom” over and over to her. I can see her face which seems to be more and more a sleep. Although there has been a smirk or two if I say something in just the right way….who knows with dementia. Seriously it sucks. Sorry, but it does. Yet the blessing is I get to see her. I pray for her and my dad who has had his own health issues being on full time dialysis. Who would have known? Garth Brooks, your song, The Dance, with its words, rocks.
I am learning that it is my attitude and approach to the day, to the interactions with people, to seeing the extraordinary in the ordinary. It is the little moments that spill out and take me by surprise. Graced moments where I feel a bigger purpose is before me. Extraordinary in such an ordinary happening. Words can’t quantify it but the awe of just seeing, feeling, knowing. Ah yes. It just is. And I silently thank God for moving within me to see what is before me.
How to live in gratefulness? Well I guess when my dog Maggie May goes into the compost under the sink and tips the contents over, spreading it all around the floor. Gratitude does not come to mind until I realize I can sweep and Swiffer it. You bet. Because she did not use the floor or furniture for a potty. It is not her fault that water and dry dog food don’t cut it. So what do I do….put the compost bin on counter and the garbage bin in pantry when leaving. Grateful. Yes. Can you be grateful and annoyed at the same time? Just kidding. Now I just need to remind my old brain to add to the list of what to check before I go out. Keys, doors closed, keys, lock the door, lights off or on depending on time of day, stove off, hat and mitts (still), purse, filled up water and food for dog, no garbage available for nosy sniffer and oh yes, keys. I miss the old days when I just borrowed the car.
But in the ordinary daily life lived, the extraordinary ways of being present and offering up thanks. And also prayers to all whom are in need of hope, healing, strength. I can do that for how can I not. So blessings today.
Let us pray for all those in our lives and those near and far who seek healing, strength, courage, compassion, and love, may they come to know a light in their darkness shines for them. Amen
Karenpondering 